Day 85 and 86: Napa Valley Swine Tasting

If you remember how much my muse enjoys the opera, here’s some fun contrast.


Warning: If you’re a vegetarian, or a person who doesn’t
like bacon, you should probably click here.

This weekend we’ve gone to Napa, to attend a livestock auction and buy a pig.

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This is the Napa Town and Country Fair and it’s great.

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There’s music, barbecue, rides, funnel cakes, and farm equipment (both antique and brand new).

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None of the old tractors have cup holders, but the new ones do. Cups must be a recent invention.

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Yep, there’s even a demolition derby. Awesome.

mudflap girl
If this isn’t the best bumper sticker ever, it’s surely in the top five.

In the livestock area, there are sheep, bunnies, cattle, swine, and all sorts of other critters. The livestock are being auctioned off by the pound, so it’s important to know how much a cow weighs.

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I’m totally bidding on that piñata.

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Inside it’s bustling, and there’s free food and beer.

The auction sounds something like this:

“Folks, number 308 is up next, and what a beauty.
We’ll start the bidding aaaat…
TWOdollartwodollarbeautifulpigfolksletssee
THREEiseeFOURdoiseefourfittyfourfittyfourfitty
folksyoudontwannamissthisone
FIVEfivefiveletsseefivefitty
yesmaam
fivefitty?yousir-fivefitty?
SIXdollargoodhoggoodhogit’sabeautifulpig
let’sseesixwhere’ssixsixsix…
…and SOLD the hog five fifty gentleman in blue.
Now number 309 look at this one folks do I hear
threedollarthreedollarTHREEfourdollarFOUR…”

You’ve gotta be quick if you want to get a pig here.

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My brunette is fast like a farm ninja.

Once the word SOLD is shouted, there’s some paperwork to do.

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…and we get to meet and talk to the person who raised the pig.

These prices (typically $3 to $5 per pound) are way above market value, but the point is to support 4H and Future Farmers, and get an extra-tasty hand-raised pig. One of the kids is giving the money to cancer research, in honor of his mom. His pig goes for more than $18 a pound, which gets a big cheer.

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Megan, the young lady who raised our pig, has just joined the Army’s airborne division.

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Rob tries to distract them, but when my muse and Ashley are together, they’re unstoppable. They’re so good at bidding that we’ve ended up with two pigs.

But what happens to the pig? It gets professionally turned into the best bacon and sausage and ribs you’ve ever tasted. We’re going to have to invite a lot of guests to our place for dinner and breakfast this year. Want to come over?

Mmm… bacon.

The rest of the weekend is a nice relaxing time in Napa. We’re staying with our friends (thanks guys!). My muse cooks dinner (and excellent dessert, yay!), and there’s good wine and that brilliantly easy perfect-weekend tempo.

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Random assertion: If you find a girl who enjoys both opera and livestock auctions, marry her quickly or you’ll have to get in line.

Steganographic data: 1864/4.1

Published in: on August 13, 2008 at 5:40 pm  Comments (2)  
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